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13 Missiles of the Apocalypse: a fun and enlightening guide to dodging disaster - FORWARD

Updated: Dec 27, 2022

Absolutely The Best FORWARD I've Ever Written

“Thirteen Missiles of the Apocalypse''. Good heavens! What a morbid title for a book. Who thinks of these things? And then adding the word FUN to the subtitle. Are ya kidding me? Worst. Marketing. Ever.

And yet, here you are…

I’d like to begin with the notion that the word APOCALYPSE has gotten a bad rap lately. It’s too often been teamed with the word ZOMBIE - which is unfortunate.

The word APOCALYPSE in its original Latin simply means “to uncover, or reveal”. What is it revealing? Usually “a major event involving destruction or damage on a catastrophic scale leading to a brand new beginning.” You know; like those movies that feature an incredibly large number of undead creatures shambling around major cities in a horrific Zombie Apocaly…

Fine! I see you out there poking holes in my logic! Problem is, while zombies aren’t real, apocalypses are. Is “apocalypses'' an actual word? Or would more than one worldwide cataclysm be apocalypti? Hmmmm…

The problem is, we always focus on the negative first half of the description. But look at the last part, "leading to a brand new beginning." The apocalypse part is simply the messy journey. For those who survive the next worldwide melee, you get all the benefits of the end game. The environmental cleanup, the PTSD, emotional scarring, the survivors' guilt... Ooops. Sorry for raining on your Utopian parade.

Getting back on topic, The Bubonic Plague in the Middle Ages could be seen as a medium sized apocalypse (a worldwide catastrophe leading to a new way of life). And look, the greater majority of humanity survived that, right? Happy ending!

The asteroid that hit the Yucatan Peninsula 66 million years ago, leading to the extinction of the dinosaurs, however, was a somewhat less survivable apocalypse. But hey, some things survived, because… here we are today- looking none the worse for wear. Happy Ending!

And here we are again, leaning out over the precipice of yet another apocalypse, just waiting for that fateful day the wind happens to blow in the wrong direction...

I’ve found that when it comes to the subject of facing future worldwide disasters, the typical human response falls into one of four categories:

1. Outright denial

“Normal Person” - “You really think our entire government and economy could collapse?”

Me - “It’s possible. It’s happened hundreds of times throughout history and the latest evidence is pointing to that conclusion.”

NP - “Nope. Ain’t gonna happen. Not in these modern times. They won’t let that happen”

I get it. After living for decades with all systems normal, it's almost impossible to imagine the world any differently than it is now. After reading a few chapters of this book however, you’ll be frightened to learn how little control THEY actually have over much of anything.

2. Over The Top Agreement

Sgt. Slaughter Prepper Guy - Government collapse? I’ve been waiting for this moment for 30 years! I’ve got 100,000 rounds of ammo and 700 AK-47’s stashed in my concrete bunker. Let's Rumba, baby!”

3. Que Sera', Sera'...

“You may be right. You may be wrong. Whichever way the future turns out, I’ve got more important things to think about right now. If the whole thing collapses at some point in the future, I’ll worry about it then.”

An understandable viewpoint, but does this attitude make sense in regards to how you handle lessor risks such as driving your car or owning your home?

“I’m not gonna worry about accidents right now. If I ever actually experience an accident, I’ll worry about buying insurance then…”

¡No me gusta!

4. I Probably Should Be…

“Yeah, I can see your point. I probably should be at least storing a little bit away for some type of emergency because you just never know.”

To which I always reply, "Yeah. A little bit. Like... a month's worth of food and water. Minimum. And the means to protect it."

But, here’s the thing, in my 50 plus trips around the sun, I’ve learned that no matter how detailed or logical any argument is, I’m never gonna change anybody’s mind. We humans can justify any point of view. In these days of “facts” and “alternate facts”, the average person is gonna believe whatever makes them feel the most comfortable at the end of the day.

With that thought in mind, this book is definitely not for the first group of people I mentioned. Your mind's already made up. THEY will never allow this rock solid system we’ve built to ever be flushed down the crapper. Funny as it may sound, I hope you, and not I, turn out to be correct.

The second group doesn’t really need my encouragement in prepping, although I hope they will thumb through the pages and arrive at a better solution to future disaster than inserting dozens of .223 caliber bullets into the bodies of their neighbors; folks who are probably very nice people who just might need some honest help in the future.

The third and fourth groups are my focus and I hope you guys (and whatever other genders may be present) will stick around and learn why now is the time to get serious in regards to your prepping efforts.

This book contains a list of thirteen ways the world could experience a major apocalypse, and more importantly, how you can survive and maybe even prosper from such a cataclysmic event. As the late, great John Littlefinger once said, “Chaos is a ladder!”

Some of the adverse events on the list, you probably shouldn’t waste time worrying about, because they’re simply not survivable (see the above-mentioned asteroid hitting the Yucatan Peninsula thingy).

If you should happen to live in or near the Yucatan Peninsula neighborhood at the precise moment a comet slams into it, preparing a “bug-out bag” or having a basement stocked with two year’s worth of dry food goods isn’t going to be a big help.

But that doesn’t mean you should completely skip out on preparing for a future disaster. One of the “missiles” I’ll cover in this book details an EMP burst or a solar flare, either of which would completely take down the nation’s electrical grid. I’ll fill you in on how an EMP burst works in a later chapter in this book. For now, I’ll leave you with this tidbit.

“In 1997, the U.S. House National Security Committee and the House Military

Research and Development Subcommittee held hearings on the potential threats to civilian systems in America from an EMP attack. Congress subsequently established the Commission to Assess the Threat to the United States from an Electromagnetic Pulse (EMP) Attack, also known as the Graham Commission after its chairman, William Graham (former science advisor to President Ronald Reagan).

A successful EMP attack could result in airplanes literally falling from the sky; vehicles would stop functioning, and water, sewer, and electrical net­works would fail-all at once. Food would rot, health care would be reduced to its most rudimen­tary level, and there would be no transporta­tion. Rule of law would become impossible to sustain as police departments would be completely overwhelmed.”

One of the most important things the congressional committee discovered is that, after an EMP attack or solar flare took down our electrical grid, it would take almost a year to get it back up.

The second takeaway they shared is that during that time, more than one hundred million deaths would take place in America alone.

That’s because the great majority of us are completely unprepared to live a life without electricity. No electricity equals no water. You see, most water is pumped from underground and then gravity fed from huge storage tanks to our household taps - and water pumps need electricity to operate.

Medical doctors tell us that three days without water will cause the average human to fall over and begin quietly assuming room temperature.

If that’s not enough, a lack of electricity would also negate mass food manufacturing and shopping centers.

Question: how long can you survive without water and a shopping center?

If, upon sticking your favorite head inside your kitchen cupboard, the answer you come up with is “two weeks or less”, congratulations! You’ll be part of the millions who perish. But hey, at least you won’t die alone…

And, not to be a buzzkill to you wealthier folk, but without electricity, you’ll have no access to your bank account. The banks will most likely be the first entities to deny access to the public until the hub-bub dies down (if it dies down).

Paper money, even gold and silver coins, will most likely be of little use after the complete looting of everything that isn’t nailed down. As one song stated about extremely hard times, “A piece of bread could buy a bag of gold…”

This dire event however, will be quite easily survivable… if you’re prepared.

Water/Food and the means to protect it.

And that’s what’s going to separate this book from the 10,000 other “Doomsday/Prepper” tomes out there. I’m not going to throw ten tons of bad news on your plate, chapter after grueling chapter, and then bid you “GOOD LUCK” in the final line.

The final section of this book is going to lay out a host of ways you can begin preparing for an adverse future without throwing your entire life into the effort; whether you’re living in a tiny apartment and barely scraping by, or you’re a multimillionaire who has substantial resources to throw at preparation.

The main thesis of this book lies in hoarding the right things. And those things are…? You’ll need to keep reading! I will give you a hint and tell you that the best things to hoard in an emergency are not technically “things”.

Lastly, I’d like to touch on the one thing I truly believe will help you get through even the worst of calamities, and that one thing is attitude.

It may sound trite, but even war-hardened special-ops soldiers, from Navy SEALS to Army Rangers will tell you that attitude really is everything when the shit hits the fan. Although this book will deal with possible civilization crushing scenarios, I don’t believe for a minute that our world is ending and I personally believe we should face the future boldly and without fear.

So, if this book, or even the thought of this book, causes you anxiety, I urge you to keep reading. Fear, as primal as that emotion is, can and should be an emotion you learn to control in your mind. The easiest way to achieve that feat is through HOPE and PREPARATION.

I’m not trying to sell fear here. I’m selling preparation. And preparation (like owning auto insurance) should lead to peace of mind, not fear and loathing.

I personally subscribe to the formula…

P = P


F = F



So, buck up soldier! I’m not creating a list of these fast approaching debacles to frighten, depress, or discourage you. I’m simply making an attempt to awaken you from your mindless, self indulgent slumber.

Danger is out there - and one of these days (soon in my opinion) your will, your attitude and your immediate tangible resources are going to be put to the test.

The stakes are literally life and death. Waiting for game-day to prepare for the fight of your life is not the greatest of strategies. The sooner your preparation, the better off you’ll be should a “less-than-positive-event” descend upon you and yours.

Hopefully this book will alarm you just enough to get you jump-started in the preparation process and then offer you hope that, under the right circumstances, you can overcome your fear and be ready to endure even the roughest of mishaps and maybe even come out of it as a better person in a better place.

Here’s to a brighter future… for those prepared to meet it.

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